What You Need to Know If You’re Going to Kill Yourself

If you’re thinking about suicide, here’s what you need to know:

After Death
After death, you’ll have the opportunity to learn about the soul-level purpose of all the important relationships, major decisions, and other dynamics from your time as a human. The souls of loved ones who have predeceased you, even some you didn’t know as humans during your current life but who are attached to you, will present themselves and invite you to begin what I call the orientation process.

They will help you understand your soul’s point of view re all those relationships, choices, and everything else, opening you up to the divine wisdom of your soul. During this process, you’ll see that you have the option of letting go of certain human personality details such as resentments, holding grudges, blaming others and yourself, and guilt, shame, regret, and self-doubt.

It’s a process of moving into love, which is the frequency on which all souls operate. But it’s entirely, completely, and wholly about your willingness to open to seeing that all of those human-life situations and relationships were coengineered by your soul with other souls for a very good reason: To learn to become the source of love for yourself. And they are in this process with your soul so their human selves have the opportunity to learn about becoming the source of love for themselves.

We hurt each other, and ignore each other. We lie, cheat, steal. We abandon and abuse each other and have unreasonable expectations and requirements of each other. All of this unfolds in human life, in the time-space dimension, according to the conspiracy of love between souls.

The souls love each other and can do nothing but love each other. But each knows that it and all the other souls require all manner of human experiences while embodied in order to truly learn what it’s like to be and live as a human, and so agreements are made that give each the opportunity to feel a variety of painful emotions resulting from interacting with each other as humans.

Releasing Resistance
In this orientation process, you’ll at first likely confront resistance to choosing to view some relationships and situations through the lens of love. You’ll likely find it challenging to accept that someone who hurt or ignored you was doing so as a service to your soul so it can learn about becoming the source of love for itself. When you can’t get the love you need from others as a human, you have the option to bring it to yourself. So, you can open to see that all the times when you weren’t loved or loved the right way are meant by the souls involved – including yours – to stir you to more self-care and self-validation.

The loved ones guiding you through your orientation will hold space for you to unwind tension, judgment, resentment, anger, sorrow, and all other painful and destructive human emotions. They will witness your process, being for you models of giving up the human debris and resistance to embracing and embodying the high level of pure love your soul carries and is all about. You will have numerous (but, really, constant) opportunities to surrender the pain as you learn about the soul-level purpose for the dynamics that generated and lead to the pain.

Certain unnecessary quirks of your personality will, during this process, begin to fade away. The need to be right, for example, or the need to have the last word. Any grudges and bitterness you might carry can’t last long here. The need to prove you’re good at something or worthy of love, too. Your orientation guides will view you as the soul-level love that is your true nature, witnessing and holding space no matter what you need to go through in order to release defensive, protective postures and notions of who you and what life and others are about and for that have caused you the pain you’ve carried as a human.

But You Don’t Have to Die to Learn This
All that said, you can also learn all of this during life. You can heal what needs healing, and you can bring love to despairing, pained, hopeless parts of you who may sometimes – or almost always – take over so that you believe they are you.

You can learn about your soul’s intentions for your most important relationships, choices, and other situations while you’re alive. You can bring a high level of soul-level insight to understand your life while you’re living. This will, I promise you, transform your experience of being human.

What it takes is a willingness to feel pain, despair, anxiety, fear, regret, guilt, shame, grief, and all other intense emotions. They can seem to overpower us when they appear, and we observe we’re losing our footing. In general, we fear being taken over by them and so we suppress them, and then in doing so give them tremendous power. If we instead become willing to feel intense, scary feelings, we can decide that we’re stronger than they are.

While your soul has you here to learn to deal with emotions, it’s not always clear about how to do this. I’m adding a list of suggestions to help you get started.

  • Step 1: Grounding practice. Get the free 13-minute grounding meditation mp3 from my homepage – click on the green pic there. Get in your body. Clear out old energies. Decide you’re willing to feel. Open your heart.
  • Step 2: Be kind to yourself. Be generous, be understanding. Refuse to judge that you carry pain and that you’ve been shaped by experience (even many lifetimes of experience – you might feel pain, grief, anger, etc., that’s beyond the scope of your current-life biography).
  • Step 3: Energetically programmed crystals to interrupt painful blocks and get energy moving. I offer a variety. Check them out at my site and email me with questions about your situation and what you’re looking to stabilize, heal, and release.
  • Step 4: Energy work to remove painful blocks and release old debris, even from other lives. If you want to do this with me, consider a coaching package and make sure to let me know you’re seeking energy work (some people do coaching with me for astrological counseling).

Recently I collected 7 programmed crystals into a trauma healing kit and threw in an 8th, all for healing trauma. If trauma’s at the root of your pain, read this post and download the two PDFs linked from it. One explains how I see trauma as an energy worker and the other lists the 8 crystals in each kit and how to use them for various effects and residues of trauma. Kits for sale are listed in the post linked above.

… And Yet You’re Free
Now – all that said, you can certainly choose to kill yourself. You are a divine being who is learning about free will while incarnated as a human. But the main point of your soul having you live on this planet is to learn to deal with emotions. A major point of your multilife journey, in fact, is in learning to process energy while in a body, and this means process emotion.

And since your soul has you here to experience all manner of human possibilities over many lives, you have the opportunity to process what hurts and has left you feeling victimized while you’re alive. There’s no need to go through the violence of suicide just to get to a place where you can learn to deal with pain.

What you probably don’t know when you’re taken over by a hurt, grieving, despairing part of self or other-life fragment is that you are stronger than all of those and all other feelings. You are, but you have to choose it. You can choose to be stronger than those frequencies by bringing compassion to yourself, by bringing love and warmth to yourself as you hurt.

It’s not easy, but your soul has you wired to, at some point, figure out how to embody its strength and resolve. You can do this by having compassion for yourself when no one else will or has, loving yourself when no one else has or will, and validating yourself when no one else has or will.

And this means you witnessing your pain, grief, and other emotions. It means you holding space for yourself to express those feelings, refusing to judge yourself for feeling and for being affected by your experiences. In other words, you can be a loving guide for yourself just as your predeceased loved ones will be after you die. And if you want some support along the way to this self-loving, -healing empowerment, call someone like me who’s here to help.

But wouldn’t you rather find out that what you’re feeling now can, in fact, be healed – and heal it? Wouldn’t you rather learn tools to deal with painful and destructive emotions? From experience in other lives killing myself from the deepest and most painful despair, I have the residues of shame, guilt, and regret that resulted from that most important of choices that I work through in my process to become the source of love for myself. When I feel painted into a corner and perceive I can’t handle what life has brought me, part of me assumes that suicide is the only answer. And I work with it – I work with the feelings, I have compassion for these parts of me, and I don’t act from their (fear-based) motivations with their (limited) tools.

I can attest to the truth that pain can be healed, and that you are stronger than the despair you might be feeling now – if you choose to be. If you choose to give life, the universe, God/Goddess, and/or the cosmos the benefit of the doubt that what comes to you in life is meant by your soul and all other souls involved to push you into greater self-love, -care, and – validation, then you can choose to release despair and heal whatever pain might be driving the decision to kill yourself. Giving others and life the benefit of the doubt is a step toward self-love, and that’s a step toward embodying the wisdom of your soul.

That sometimes you can’t see your strength and other possibilities is okay – you’re human, after all, learning over a long process of multiple lives how to become the source of love for yourself. So people like me hold space for you and invite you to take a higher view of the pain you might be experiencing that makes life seem meaningless, impossible, or not worth the effort.

Take care of yourself, and be in touch if I can be of service to you along your path.

Additional resource: Ascended Master Djehuty’s teaching “Healing Suicide” on YouTube (audio only).

Tom Jacobs is an Evolutionary Astrologer, Energy Worker, and Channel with an active global practice. A Level II graduate of Steven Forrest’s Apprenticeship Program (member since 2004), Tom offers consultations, ongoing intuitive coaching, tutoring and energy work, and a new series of Evolutionary Astrology classes to teach you to do astrology in the ways taught to him by an ascended master. 16 books, 2 natal reports, energetically programmed crystals, and dozens of astrology and channeled/healing mp3s are available from Tom via tdjacobs.com.